Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster?
Because he was a commontater.
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Where was the spaghetti going?
To the meatball!
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Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white," or "The yolk of the egg is white?"
Neither. The yolk of an egg is yellow!
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Which moves faster, heat or cold?
Heat, because you can always catch a cold.
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What's full of holes but still holds water?
A sponge.
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Where does the Easter Bunny have breakfast?
At IHOP!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
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What's Irish and stays out in the back yard, even when its raining?
Paddy O'Furniture
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What is the greatest worldwide use for cowhide?
To cover cows!
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What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
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What does a cat have that no other animal has?
Kittens!
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Why do sharks only swim in salt water?
Because swimming in pepper water makes them sneeze!